Welcome, beautiful boy

A year ago today I was standing in front of the Mona Lisa in the Louvre museum in Paris with my daughter, speaking to my ex-partner (my daughter’s father) via FB Messenger, reassuring him and telling him to take deep breaths, to trust the doctors, and to have faith. He was about to witness the […]

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The most usual lie

I wrote this poem some years ago, but I have taken it out today and dusted it off, editing it here and there. I removed a whole verse and changed words and line structure and some punctuation. It feels more authentic now. Sometimes revisiting a piece reminds us how far we have come, and how […]

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Loving and losing our children

New Zealand’s appalling youth suicide rate is in the news again, as is our impotency in the face of it. A new UNICEF report has found New Zealand’s youth suicide rate – teenagers between 15 and 19 – to be the highest of a long list of 41 OECD and EU countries. The usual culprits […]

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When You Are 50

When You Are 50 When you are 50, you are reborn. The same skin, the same face, the same body, but different. You are in the next half, now. You cannot waste a moment. When you are 50, you love this face, this skin you’re in. You love that quick temper, that wild laugh, those […]

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The Lost One

Last year was a year of endings and new beginnings for me. Heartbreak competed with hope and a new sense of freedom. This is the first story I have written for quite some time. I scatter pieces of someone else’s imaginary life in front of me. It has been expertly broken. It is up to […]

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Building Bridges

A friend sent me a much-needed text yesterday. Earlier in the day we had walked together and I had updated her on the very difficult period I was going through. Here is an edited extract: Darling, I’m so so sorry that your heart is so heavy. You’ll get through this…Keep thinking and living in baby […]

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I used to 🙂 them but now I’m 🤔

I was sending a text to someone the other day, and it got me thinking. This person had let me down and I was feeling a little put out, but not enough to be harbouring any resentment. She texted, “Are we all OK?”, in response to which I sent back the word “Yep.” At least, […]

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